This Is War
by Knights of Cydonian Starlight
Summary: It's movie night, and Reid and Morgan have a bit too much fun with the whipped cream.


Sara: Oh gauds. Hey all. This is a really fluffy Sperek fic. I'mma post this before I think about reconsidering...

Sky: *sigh* Ahh, fluff. Anyways, we don't own Criminal Minds. Enjoy!

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><p>This Is War<p>

It was Sunday night. Movie night, Reid remembered. He and Morgan always watched crappy, cheesy movies on Sunday nights – profiling serial killers all the time was quite depressing, you know, and they both needed a bit of comic relief in their lives. And it was sorta kinda fun to criticize the detective for his horrific deductive reasoning skills.

So, Reid found himself in the kitchen of their shared apartment, making two gigantic ice cream sundaes with liberal amounts of chocolate sauce. Whatever flavour of ice cream he found in the freezer, he would always pile the stuff with Hershey's Special Syrup, because… well he seemed to never get enough chocolate, if you know what I mean.

"You know that apron always drives me insane," Reid heard someone growl in his ear, and an almost sweltering warmth enveloped the him. He leaned into that touch, almost forgetting that he had the bottle of chocolate sauce upturned in his hand.

"Oops," Reid muttered as some of the sickly sweet stuff splattered onto his apron. It was his favourite too – pink with white flowers – and he wore it _just because_ he wanted to drive his boyfriend insane.

Morgan chuckled and licked a bit of chocolate off of his boyfriend's fingers, who blushed fervently in return.

"You forgot the whipped cream, pretty boy," he added and let go of Reid for a moment to pilfer through the refrigerator. Grinning triumphantly, he held up a brand-new looking can of Reddi-Whip.

Reid frowned. "I don't approve, Derek. You know that stuff is terrible for you."

"It's only twenty calories a serving!" Morgan exclaimed indignantly. He turned the can in his hand just to confirm it and then playfully poked his significant other in the stomach. "And goodness _knows_ you need all the calories you can get."

Reid turned his back on Morgan and the abomination of a food called Reddi-Whip, shedding his apron and tossing it into the laundry shoot across the hall. He padded back into the kitchen armed with spoons and napkins from the dining room table.

"That _thing_ that you're holding, Derek," he said dangerously, wielding the spoon like it was a double-edged sword, "is 81.8 percent fat and 18.2 percent carbs. _Not_ what a Special Agent should eat, especially if that Special Agent is running through forests or chasing down criminals or _God knows_ what else you do when I'm at the police station sorting through files."

Morgan laughed and tackled his beloved with another hug, still wielding the accursed can of cream.

"You're so cute when you're bitchy," he murmured and softened the insult by kissing his lover behind the ear. Reid merely scowled in return.

"Maybe you'll change your mind if you taste some?" Morgan offered and shook the can in Reid's face. The latter backed away from the larger man's chest and wrinkled his nose.

"No, Derek."

"C'mon, Spence, _please_?"

"No."

"Spencer?"

"I said _no_ – "

But Reid was silenced by a mouthful of Reddi-Whip whipped cream. He swallowed and raised his voice in exasperation.

"I swear to God, you do that again, Derek Morgan, and I will – "

Another mouthful of cream. Morgan was having the time of his life.

"What was that you were saying, pretty boy?" he teased and licked a bit of white off of Reid's top lip. The latter sighed and leaned into the kiss, but Morgan still pulled away, playfulness and mischief lighting those wicked brown eyes.

"Hey!" Reid shouted as a dollop of whipped cream made its way to his nose. When his boyfriend merely laughed at the ludicrous white spot, Reid grabbed the chocolate syrup bottle off of the counter.

"Oh yeah?" he retorted, looking hilarious as he held the bottle as though it were a bazooka. "Two can play at this game."

And Morgan was soon covered in ribbons of chocolate syrup, darker than his skin.

"This means war, pretty boy!" the man roared over the television commercials. He closed his eyes, shielding his face from more chocolate syrup with his bare forearm, and sprayed a cloud of white all over the other man.

They spent the duration of whatever action film they picked out chasing each other around the house, covered in sticky sweets. After the protagonist caught the bad guy and the damsel in distress proclaimed his love for him, the two agents collapsed on the couch, their breath coming in wheezy giggles.

"We should… do… this… more often!" Morgan gasped as he tickled Reid under the ribs, leaving the other man a pile of laughing Reddi-Whip and Hershey's Special Syrup. For a while they just kept laughing and laughing and laughing until both of them caught their breath, sighing into each other, suddenly so tired.

"I think… I can learn to like whipped cream," Reid muttered lazily as he dozed against Morgan's shoulder. The light of the television reflected on his face, giving his face an almost ethereal glow. Morgan's expression softened and he brushed away a lock of hair that fell across his lover's forehead. He kissed the pale expanse of skin, smelling sweetened chocolate and cream, and when he spoke his voice was barely a whisper.

"That's just what I wanted to hear."

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><p>Sara: WOULD YOU LIKE SOME CHEESE WITH THAT CORN? Oh, jeezus that was fluffy x.x I hope you guys en...joyed? ^^ Well if you did or didn't, it's always nice to drop a review, I like to know what I did right and wrong :) Thanks guys, and until next story ~<p> 


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